


Breaking Point

by Anuschja



Series: The H-Universe Teasers [2]
Category: Jeremy Renner - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Feels, Too many feels
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-13
Updated: 2014-06-13
Packaged: 2018-02-04 13:11:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1780312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anuschja/pseuds/Anuschja
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You finally break under the pressure, with disturbing results.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The phone call

**Author's Note:**

> Unfortunately, I don't own Mr. Renner.
> 
> Reviews are always welcome.

**Chapter 1**

 

“ _I'm sorry, Jeremy. I can't do this anymore.”_

Those were the words that changed everything.

It was selfish, but after six weeks you just couldn't take it any more. It wasn't the longest time you had ever been apart, but this time it was different. You would be apart for at least eight more weeks. With no chance of meeting in between.

Sure, three months would still not make the record, not even close.

Why had it worked then, but not now? Then you had always been able to synchronize your schedules, had been at least in the same country as the other, or just a plane ride away.

All those times before you had somehow managed to be at the same place at the same time, spending two hours, two days, once even a week together.

But this time there was no hope for that. You were worlds apart, literally. He was touring Europe to promote his new movie and you were in Japan, negotiating the takeover of a company.

All of this had happened before in some way, new was that you would be stuck here until negotiations were over. The CEOs, that had run the company you were trying to buy into the ground, were driving a hard bargain. They didn't want to admit defeat to a foreigner, much less to a WOMAN. Sure, you were fucking rich and successful, and you could make all their problems go away with just your signature on a piece of paper, but in their eyes you were still just a woman, you were supposed to be at home, cooking dinner for your husband, raising his children.

Normally, you would have just said 'Fuck this shit and fuck you, I'm leaving.' but you couldn't. You knew you could save the company, save the employees. After all, that is what you do: buy a run-down company, build it up again, save the employees in the process. So you went to these stupid meetings, day in and day out, sitting in a room with six men who didn't want you there, who were speaking in Japanese to each other about you, because they thought you couldn't understand them. But you did, every fucking word, every fucking insult. And you still couldn't make yourself leave, because you were always thinking about the people, they always came first.

_Where did that leave you? Where did that leave you and Jeremy?_

You couldn't just give up and leave Japan, as much as you wanted to.

He was in Europe, schedule packed tight, running from photo shoot to press conference to interview, and then off to the next country.

These past six weeks you were living for stolen minutes of telephone calls, where you would just tell each other things, silly things, dirty things, things you'd do when you finally saw each other again.

And it got you through six dreadful weeks, but last night it was just all too fucking much, too many fucking insults, too many nights alone; and last night you finally couldn't hold back any more.

You immediately regretted saying those words, you wanted to explain to him how much it hurt, hearing his voice in your ear without feeling his breath on your skin.

“ _I understand,”_ was all he said and then you were listening to dead air.


	2. On the other end (of the line)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by this pic:

I was trying to distract myself by watching TV, but it wasn't working, so I switched it off.

My thoughts always returned to the call. A call I had placed, because for some reason, I always needed to hear your voice before a photo shoot or an interview. I didn't even take the time difference into account anymore, I just expected you to pick up and say something that would make me feel better. And you always did – except for the last call.

“ _I'm sorry, Jeremy. I can't do this anymore.”_ Hearing those words made my heart skip a beat and my brain stopped working. Before I could think of something to say, the words “ _I understand_ ” were out of my mouth and I had disconnected.

I so desperately wanted to call you again and tell you, that I felt the same, that these past six weeks had been hell, that the daily phone calls, emails, and video calls weren't enough anymore. But I didn't, because I didn't have a solution. Sure, I could call off the promo tour, other actors did it all the time, and it would make you happy for a bit and then you'd rip my head off. I still remember the speech you gave me about how important this promo tour was, how you responded to my mere mentioning of the possibility of not going on this tour. _“Don't you fucking dare...,”_ was all you said, leaving the rest of the sentence open, but from the look you gave me, I could pretty much tell what would happen if I dared. And you'd be right.

If I called you now and told you how I felt it would just end with you telling the Japanese to go fuck themselves and jumping on a plane to me. And I knew I just had to say the word, but I also knew how much you wanted this contract. You wanted it so much that you would take crap from these fuckheads you were forced to sit down with day in and day out. I'd never understand how you could endure sitting there and letting them insult you. Maybe it's because you're so much stronger than I am now or ever will be. You only ever could rely on your own strength, now you're being strong for the both of us and the combined weight of both our responsibilities is starting to weigh you down and break you apart.

And despite knowing all this, here I sit, watching TV instead of thinking about how to solve this, how to make us both happy.

I know I have to stop taking you, your strength, your love for granted.

_Your love!_ You always tell and show me, how much you love me.

Suddenly, I'm wondering.

_Did I ever tell you, I love you without you doing so first?_

_Why do you even love me, while I treat you so callously?_

I realize now, I don't deserve your love.

But maybe I can make myself worthy again.

Because I need you, I need you so much it hurts.

But I also want you to be happy and maybe you will be happier without me.

And although being without you would break me, I'd silently leave your life so that one day, you can find your happiness again.

 

And just like that, an idea forms in my head and I reach for the phone...

**Author's Note:**

> Reviews are always welcome.


End file.
